Phases of a first time mom's attitude to motherhood

I created this blog while I was patiently waiting for our bundle of joy to arrive, planning to write AT LEAST once a week about all of the wonderful, and possibly comical things my baby does. Well, that didn't happen. The fact that I thought I could keep up with a weekly post is comical in itself.  In 9 days, she will be NINE MONTHS OLD. But hey, it's never too late right?  Motherhood has been wonderful, exhausting, rewarding, and quite an adventure. I remember as a new teacher seeing a diagram of the phases of a first year teachers' attitude toward teaching, and strangely enough, I feel that I have gone through the same phases as a new mom. It began with anticipation, then made a downward dive into full on survival mode. The first three months of her life were pure survival for all parties involved. I was an emotional wreck and cried every day at 7:30pm. I cried because we created such a precious, tiny human, I cried because I didn't think I could love my husband any more, but seeing him with our baby made my heart burst, and I cried because I felt like I had our baby on my boob every hour of every day.  I remember my husband bouncing our baby like a boss while she just cried and refused to be soothed by him, and he looked at me with the sympathy in his eyes one feels when seeing a lost puppy as he said, "I think she's hungry".  I should mention that to this day, she will not take a bottle, so I am still her sole life source. I couldn't wait to get her out of my belly and share the responsibility of keeping her alive, but she had other plans. That being said, I transitioned nicely into the next phase on the diagram,  which is disillusionment. So here was this beautiful, absolutely precious bundle of joy that God has blessed us with and I love so much, but my husband couldn't give her a bottle (or give me any relief).  In my mind, this wasn't how having a baby was supposed to go. Slowly but surely, she started to go longer between feedings and I entered the next phase: rejuvenation. I started to finally feel like myself again. I could leave the house without extreme anxiety that I would have to whip my boob out in public. I started to anticipate her needs, and she started interacting with us more. She transitioned from a newborn who literally slept, peed, pooped, farted, and sometimes smiled, into a baby. A very adorable, inquisitive, fun baby who conquered milestones earlier than all of those baby charts said she would. The next phase of the diagram is reflection, which I am experiencing now. I am thinking about how hard it was, but how fun it is now. She stands up, sits down, then stands up holding onto whatever is in her reach countless times a day. She crawls, and crawls FAST.  She cruises, holding onto anything to give her support as she takes steps to get where she wants to go. She climbs the stairs (we totally encouraged this and immediately regret doing so). She makes goofy faces to make us laugh. She is very ticklish, and has the cutest little baby giggle when you tickle her in the right places. She's eating baby foods now, and loves to take bites of my banana every morning. Her favorite thing to play with is a plastic bottle, and anything she can easily carry in her right hand while crawling around. Her favorite thing to do is take everything out of the middle pocket on her diaper bag, which consists of Mommy's Chapstick, lipgloss, eye glass cleaner, flash drive, and a Starbucks gift card. She babbles and maybe says mommy, but that could just be wishful thinking. She truly is a joy, and I can't believe she has been with us for almost nine months. The last phase on the diagram is anticipation, something my husband and I both feel and talk about. We wonder what her voice will sound like, what her interests will be, what her hair will look like, and how sassy she will be when she's 2.  Though as we anticipate what life will be like, we will continue to enjoy this full of personality little nugget! 

Due Date

     August 14, 2014, the day my husband and I have been waiting for since our first trip to the doctor back in January.  It is the day that seemed like it would never come, and now it's finally here.  Yet there is one thing missing-oh, our baby!  She is still hanging out in her momma's belly, taking up A LOT of room, and making sleep a very challenging task.  I can't even remember what life was like, or what my body felt like, when I was not pregnant.  

     Luckily one of the wonderful midwives, who loved being pregnant as much as I do, said we could set an induction date for August 18th if sweet Harper decided to take her time making her grand entrance into the world.  Knowing our baby will be here in no later than four days brings about many different kinds of emotions.  I am thrilled we will both get to see and hold the tiny human we created in our arms;  I'm nervous that there is something we have forgotten to prepare for since we are first-timers; I'm eager to experience the rest of 2014 without a baby in my belly; I'm still somewhat apprehensive about this whole becoming a parent thing, yet ready at the same time to have her here and start learning our baby.  

     I am also feeling blessed to have been able to experience pregnancy and am enjoying reminiscing on one of the best days during the whole pregnancy-the photo shoot with Michael's cousin Anna.  We had a blast capturing such a special time in our relationship!  I'm thankful we have these memories to look back on.  It's funny to think that I felt like I looked SO pregnant then, and I was only about 29 weeks along.  Now having hit 40 weeks, I am VERY pregnant and look like I'm carrying a basketball in my belly!   Enjoy the photos from our photo shoot :) 

"My Momedy" seems like a great title to the adventure I am about to embark on in about a month when I become a mother.  I have already had my share of laughs in the prenatal/breastfeeding groups we have attended, and I can only imagine that trying to figure life out as a new parent will be somewhat of a comedy.  At least that is the approach I plan to take.  I learned in my first year of teaching, if you don't laugh, you will go insane.  We already enjoy being goofy, so we plan to laugh a lot as we become first time parents, and share our stories here!

July 4th, 2014